Remembering Year 2 . . .

The second year of medical school . . . They said that it was suppose to get easier. I believe that they were wrong! Maybe it was just our own personal circumstances. Maybe it wasn't. Maybe, just maybe, I am not the only one that thinks that the second year was harder. When talking to people who were a year or more ahead of me, I had been warned about 5th quarter. I had heard that the coursework would get tougher, the exams would increase, and that I would see less of my medical student; however, others told me that it would not be as difficult on the whole family has the first year and transition were. I think that those people lied!

Okay, so maybe we just had a bad start! During the finals week of my husband's 4th Quarter, our son had to be rushed to the emergency room and stay overnight at the hospital. The reason . . . he was not getting enough oxygen. We are still not exactly sure why. After many tests and multiple doctors, we still do not know the cause. We probably never will. We just hope and pray that it was a one-time deal. Because of our little guy's sickness, my husband ended up not being able to have his little week vacation in between quarters to prepare for the dreaded 5th quarter. He had to finish taking his postponed finals over this break so that he could be with our son while we were dealing with the mysterious sickness. A decision that looking back on, he or I do not regret! After all . . . family is our number one priority and always will be.

As time wore on, we finally were able to relax about our son's health. We no longer were waking up every hour in the middle of the night to make sure that he was breathing okay. He appeared to be a strong, healthy boy and all the tests agreed. My hubby was then able to focus more of his attention on his studies. During this dreaded quarter, we often only saw him for dinner. He would come home, eat dinner, and head off back to the school to study some more. I was staying busy myself with my ever-changing job and being involved in SAA. When he was home, it was usually because I needed to be somewhere for an SAA event. So, you could say, we really did not get to see each other that often. Boy, was I glad when the end of that quarter finally was here!

Sixth quarter was probably the easiest of all quarters from the medical school aspect! It helped to make up for the lack of time spent together the previous quarter. However, once again, a difficult time hit us during his finals week of this quarter! An early Sunday morning in February, I received a phone call from my devastated father that my grandfather had been killed by a drunk driver a few short hours before. Though most of the time I am okay with being so far away from family, it was times like these that I wished I was closer. I tend to be a private person when situations like these hit and preferred not to talk about my grandfather's death or how I was personally dealing with it. We flew back home for the funeral and to be with family. That was VERY difficult, and it was hard that it was only a short trip. We had meant to spend my husband's spring break traveling to what would be our new home in Michigan, but once again, he had to spend his break studying and finishing up his finals. We ended up postponing this trip until a week later and shortened our trip to better accomodate the little time that we had left to fit in our schedules. Now, I make it sound like all these family emergencies really put a glitch in my husband's medical school plan. As I said before, family is our number one priority. It always has been and always will be. However, with that said, I would like to state the obvious here. Medical school is hard enough. When times like these arise, things that are completely beyond your control, it only makes things more difficult. We try to make the lemonade, but I don't like to sugar coat it and sometimes, it can just be hard to keep all the bitterness out of it!

Seventh quarter . . . not a bad quarter class-wise; however, this was the time that the pressure really started coming for the Step 1 Board Exams. My husband does not feel that he is very good at these types of tests and really began to stress out. He was really worried about his classes, but these boards were always looming over him. At first, I didn't completely understand. Then, he explained to me how important these scores can be in determining his (and, ultimately our) residency location. The quarter was over in a flash, but we began seeing less and less of our medical student once again. Every waking hour, he was off studying for the board exams. I was still dealing with the death of my grandfather because of the criminal trial that was going on back home. And, on top of it all, I was beginning to worry and stress myself out about the upcoming move. We once again had to deal with reserving a moving truck, finding a place to live (that would be able to meet our limited budget), finding a new job, and one of the hardest things of all, finding childcare for my son. That was a lot of "stuff" on one plate! I wanted to spend as much time with my new-found friends in Kirksville before we all went our separate ways again. I was finishing up my job and wanted to spend more time with my son. There was so much I wanted to do and had to do, but could not find the time to fit it in. Looking back on the first two years, this was THE hardest time. It was difficult being away from my husband so often, we all know how moving is a stressful event in and of itself, and to add all the "extras" just complicates matters so much more.

On the bright side . . . we got through the boards!!!!! And, my husband did very well on them!! I couldn't be more proud of him!!!! One last hurdle . . . eighth quarter. This was definitely a hurdle because I still do not understand why we had to wait around for this quarter. It was a lot of little details regarding rotations and most of the time, my husband was not even there half the day. He even had a week off right in the middle of a 4 week quarter. Seriously, what was the point? We did get to spend a lot more time together and catch up though . . . something we definitely needed!

Now, on to rotations . . . yippee!! Where the fun really begins!! :)

Looking Back at Year 1 . . .

Since I was reminiscing the other day about my husband applying to medical schools, I thought that I would also reminisce about the first two years of med school while it is still fairly fresh in my memory! I hope that this is not too boring to you!! :)

When we moved to Missouri for my hubby to start medical school, we had a son only 7 months old. Of all things, this was one of my biggest stresses and worries about medical school. Would my hubby get to spend time with his son (and me, of course!)? Were we going to be one of the only ones with kids, especially one so young? Were our families' worries about going back to school instead of concentrating on our families going to become true? Did we make the right decision? Seriously, all of this stress was so not worth it!!! :) If there is anyone else out there with these same things on your mind, my personal recommendation is . . . Don't worry about it!!! All of my ideas about being a medical school family were completely wrong!

When we showed up to orientation, we saw many people with children! A few couples from our orientation group definitely stand out to me even today . . . one couple with a 6 week old son and one couple who was expecting their first child in the spring. Just to see these two families relieved so much stress, but talking to them and getting to know them better, has done so much more!! I think you gals know who you are and I don't know if I ever really said thank you. So . . . THANK YOU!! I don't know if you ever realized what a difference you made in my life from the start of medical school, but you truly did. And, who knew that you would make an even more of a difference as our journey has progressed. Both of you (and the rest of your families) are amazing and I am a better person for knowing you! :)

Anyways . . . this time was not just the start of medical school, but also the first time that I returned to work full-time since giving birth to my son! We traveled half way across the country, left everything behind that we have ever known, and planted ourselves in a place that we had never saw ourselves being! We experienced a lot of anxiety, from making it in med school to finding childcare that we felt comfortable with to even just balancing our busy lives. I won't lie . . . . it was hard at first. The first quarter was very stressful because of trying to find this balance. The second quarter was better. We were beginning to find our balance. My hubby was back in the swing of things from being out of school for so long and he made it a point to eat dinner with us every evening and spend every Saturday morning together as a family. I was able to get more involved in the amazing organization of SAA (now known as the Student Advocate Association, but at the time called the Student Associates' Auxiliary or something like that)!! This kept me involved and busy, meeting people, helping out, and becoming more educated in the field of osteopathy. In addition, I did things with one of my co-workers who ended up becoming a very good friend and was one who truly helped to keep me grounded. And, to top things off, my son was able to find little playmates through his daycare and other med student families. By the time the third quarter came around, we were feeling very good about where we were out, we were planning a trip back home to visit family, and I was looking forward to my summer off with my boys! We had figured it out and we had survived the first year of med school! Woohoo!

Before we could leave, however, my hubby had to do his preceptorship. This worried me a little! He was going to have to stay at his preceptor site an hour and a half away. He would be home on the weekends, of course, but we have never really been apart that long before. As I look back on it, it went pretty smoothly. My son and I stayed busy preparing for our trip, wrapping things up at my office, and playing in the sun (a LOT!). We would talk with my hubby every evening, often multiple times, and we would summarize our days. Mine . . . playing in the sun, doing our weekly errands, etc. His . . . experiencing the hospital, taking patient histories, and performing rectal exams! Honestly, I am so glad that I am not the med student!! :)

We finally got to hit the road to head back home. We were on the road and living out of a suitcase for five weeks, traveling through the states of Iowa, South Dakota, Wyoming, Montana, Idaho, and Washington. We saw a lot of family and friends and it was definitely a trip to remember!

When we got back to Missouri, my hubby had one last quarter left before he would consider himself an official second year. It was a short quarter and I don't remember too much about it . . . I guess it was not that bad!

Personally, I thought that we had made it through the worst. I had heard that the first year was the hardest. For me, not so true . . . . but, enough rambling for now! I will write about our second year later! I don't feel like writing a book today and second year was a doozy . . . so until next time . . . :)

Do You Remember?

Do you remember the time before medical school? The time that medical school was just a figment of our future and dreams? Before the MCAT, before ALL the applications, and before all the interviews? If you can consider yourself a MSW, then I know that you have been here!

My husband and I were recently just discussing this time in our lives, and honestly, we are completely amazed at how far we have come in the last few years. My husband originally did not want to go to medical school. He had not been dreaming about being a doctor all of his life, but he did know that he enjoyed studying the sciences. He actually ended up becoming a medical technologist (that would be his first six years of higher education) and began debating the idea of applying to Physician Assistant programs. I remember multiple conversations between the two of us about where life would take us next and I just kept asking him . . . why a PA? Why not a full-fledged doctor? What were his reasons about taking this path instead of medical school? Come to find out, he did not think that he would be accepted into a medical school! He thought that he had a better chance of making it into a PA program with his grades from undergraduate!

Needless to say, we had many more conversations before he was finally convinced that he should at lease give it a try. This was not easy!! He really wanted to be a doctor deep down, but was just so unsure that he wanted to put out the time and money to just be rejected! Throughout this entire time, I kept giving him tons of encouragement letting him know that I would be here for him through both the thick and thin. And, I kept reminding him that I did not want to play the "What If" game ten years down the road . . . What if I had applied to med school? What if I had been accepted? Ten years down the road would have been a lot more difficult to apply and be accepted then at that moment. He had so many amazing opportunities and experiences behind and in front of him . . . and he finally decided to go for it!!

I remember reading over his many applications (both the first and second round!), proofreading and making suggestions along the way. I remember him getting his first rejection letter and then his first, second, and all the way through his sixth invitation for an interview! And, then the most exciting part . . . his acceptance to his first (which we quickly declined!) all the way through his fourth!! He never imagined that he would make it that far and actually get the choice of where he wanted to attend med school!

This brought a new predicament . . . how do we choose between our top 3 choices? (And, I say we because it was a family decision, not an individual one.) I was expecting our first child and we wanted to have an area that was a good place to raise children, a place that I would be able to find a job and feel at home in, and of course, where he would get the highest quality of education. We deliberated about this for days before we finally made our choice . . . ATSU-KCOM. We were heading to Missouri! We could not believe it (and neither could our families!). Many of our friends and families were shocked! Why would Craig decide to go back to school when we had a child to raise? Weren't we getting too old to go back to school?

Through all the doubts (including our own), I have to say that we have made the right decision. As I am sitting here writing this, I am now a third year MSW. We cannot believe that we are over half-way done with the schooling part. In less than two years, my husband will be a doctor! There have been times along the way that have been easier than I expected and there have been times that have been harder than expected, but overall, I believe that the whole experience has made my whole family better because of it! We are stronger and we are proud of our accomplishments . . . and, I know that this is simply the training for what is to come . . . internship and residency! :)

What is a MSW?

MSW stands for Medical Student Widow. If you have ever been a spouse or significant other to a medical student, then you can consider yourself one! As a medical student, students refer to themselves as MSI, MSII, etc. depending on their year. Why can't we have a special name as well? Seriously, we may not be taking the tests and experiencing the practicums or clinicals, but we do have our own experiences just the same! Though each of us have different experiences, we ALL can relate! Honestly, I have grown since I have joined this group (through both the good times and the difficult) and I am proud to call myself a MSW!!